Monday, March 12, 2012

What Is That On Your Neck?

Last May I had spine surgery to remove two degenerative disks from my neck that were bulging into my spinal cord and pressing on the C6 nerve root for my right arm.  My doctor implanted an artificial disk between the C5 and C6 vertebrae and fused the C6 and C7 vertebrae. 

The post surgical incision was not pleasant to look at.  It was a little more than an inch long and clearly visible just above the collar line of my tee shirt.  Swollen and red, Kellie said it looked like someone had sewn a horizontal vagina on my neck.  Since I could not shave near the wound, my scruffy stubble enhanced the visual effect.  

Kellie would not look at it.  When we went out to a restaurant, she refused to sit across from me. "I can't eat while looking at your p#*sy neck," she complained (her words, not mine, I'm just reporting what she said).  When I wanted to gross her out, I would rub it, roll my eyes, and start to act out Meg Ryan’s delicatessen scene from “When Harry Met Sally.”  Sadly, the scar is almost invisible now.  Too bad, I miss it.


  1. I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to pin this on Pinterest as a must read. Ha!

    1. No problem, you must always do what whatever the doctor's wife says.