Monday, August 19, 2013

The Menopause Bomb

Credit: James Cridland
Over the past few weeks, one of my older posts, The Thermodynamics of Menopause, has been getting flooded with hits from the Ukraine. That post explained how my wife’s 35,000 hot flashes released energy equivalent to 4,809 sticks of dynamite. There’s only two possible explanations for the sudden Ukrainian interest in Kellie’s World: They're either having a global warming induced menopause crisis and they’re looking for expert help, or terrorists working out of the former Soviet Republic are trying to weaponize menopausal women. I hope that I wasn’t the cause of those recent terror warnings that lead to the closure of several U.S. Embassies across the Middle East.

Friday, August 2, 2013

BREAKING NEWS: Candidate Says He's Not A Weiner

Photo Credit
NEW YORK–In an effort to head off yet another scandal, Anthony Weiner, the disgraced politician who thrust himself into the political orgy otherwise known as New York City’s mayoral race, held a press conference today outside The Pleasure Chest in West Village.